Size Chart - Gildan 5000
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TOP CUNT T-Shirt | Aussie Top Gun Satire Tee
Charcoal / S
$29.90
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• Printed to order
• Ships in 2-7 business days
• Tracking included
• No-drama fixes: misprint/damage/wrong item = reprint or refund (photo proof, 30 days).
• Shipping (AU): $12 first tee, +$2 each extra
• Classic unisex fit, 100% cotton
Size Chart - Gildan 5000
Gildan 5000 Unisex T-Shirt Sizing
- S: Width 18" (45.72 cm), Length 28" (71.12 cm), Sleeve 15" (38.35 cm)
- M: Width 20" (50.80 cm), Length 29" (73.66 cm), Sleeve 16.5" (41.91 cm)
- L: Width 22" (55.88 cm), Length 30" (76.20 cm), Sleeve 18" (45.72 cm)
- XL: Width 24" (60.96 cm), Length 31" (78.74 cm), Sleeve 19.5" (49.53 cm)
- 2XL: Width 26" (66.04 cm), Length 32" (81.28 cm), Sleeve 21" (53.34 cm)
- 3XL: Width 28" (71.12 cm), Length 33" (83.82 cm), Sleeve 22.5" (56.90 cm)
- 4XL: Width 30" (76.20 cm), Length 34" (86.36 cm), Sleeve 24" (60.20 cm)
- 5XL: Width 32" (81.28 cm), Length 35" (88.90 cm), Sleeve 25.5" (63.50 cm)
Measurements are approximate and taken from the center of the garment.
Manufacturing
Product sourcing: We use quality blank apparel sourced from trusted suppliers.
Made to order: Every piece is printed fresh when you order it — not dragged off a dusty warehouse shelf.
Smarter fulfilment: Where available, orders can be produced closer to the delivery address to cut down on unnecessary shipping and get them on the road faster.
$29.90
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TOP CUNT T-Shirt | Aussie Top Gun Satire Tee
TOP CUNT — T-SHIRT
Talk to me, Goose.
This isn’t a nickname — it’s a call sign. For the bloke who flies low, ignores advice, and somehow still ends up being right. A satirical Australian parody t-shirt for anyone who doesn’t need to say much because the room already knows.
Wear it to the pub, the BBQ, the footy, the servo, or anywhere egos are measured in silence and eye contact. Expect nods from legends, side-eyes from HR types, and someone quietly admitting this shirt might be uncomfortably accurate.
Heavyweight cotton that holds formation under pressure.
Classic unisex fit — size up for oversized.
• 100% pre-shrunk cotton (Gildan 5000)
• Machine wash cold, tumble dry low (keeps the print perfect)
Because you’re not the best pilot in the room — you’re the Top Cunt.
AusPost wants around $12 for the first one — then it’s only +$2 each extra tee.
Buying just one is a rookie move, grab one for ya mate too!. 🍻
• Printed to order
• Ships in 2-7 business days
• Tracking included
• No-drama fixes: misprint/damage/wrong item = reprint or refund (photo proof, 30 days).
• Shipping (AU): $12 first tee, +$2 each extra
• Classic unisex fit, 100% cotton
Shipping
We will work quickly to ship your order as soon as possible. Once your order has shipped, you will receive an email with further information. Delivery times vary depending on your location.
Manufacturing
Our products are manufactured both locally and globally. We carefully select our manufacturing partners to ensure our products are high quality and a fair value.
$29.90